What you like matters, because You matter

We all experience procrastination from time to time. Some of us occasionally and some of us habitually.  Did you ever ask yourself the question why? Are you curious to know the answer? Would you like to change this pattern? Read on to learn that we rarely do things for the reason we think.

A client came to see me with complaints of lower abdominal pains. She has been through the medical field and did not receive a diagnosis. Her tests were all negative, which is a really good thing, yet she felt she would feel better if something was found, so she knew what to do and “get rid of the pain”.  Guided by her desire, searching for an answer to feel better, one day she heard about craniosacral therapy and she made her first appointment with me.

During CST, it is not uncommon that emotions resurface.  Tears, laughter, anger, joy, frustration etc… are all welcome.  The memories that we may become aware of during a session are helpful in making sense of a long-held ache or pain even if there was no previous diagnosis.  There is a part of us that is connected to Infinite Intelligence. Our Inner Physician/Intuition brings the real value in Its guidance towards recognizing the relationship between the memory, the emotion and the aches and pains experienced in the body. An event, coupled with an emotion may be the cause of a bodily ache and this same can also be preventing the healing from occurring.  Our current reactions and behavior patterns can be recognized by the memory of the patient and with the help of the Inner Physician the repatterning can begin to take place.  This is where SomatoEmotional Release (SER) becomes part of the CST session. This can be prompted by the therapist or it can be prompted by the Intelligent System in way of a memory and a stop in the craniosacral rhythm, Dr. Upledger called the significant detector.  SER is different from traditional talk therapy as cells have consciousness and store memories as energy. We experience this energy stored as tight, tense, stuck, dense, hard, aches and pain. When the patient is able to repattern, change perception of the memory that popped up, the tissues release tension and become softer, lighter, freer.

In my third session with my client, she experienced waves of movement first in her lower extremities, later on along her thoracic spine and then felt it stopped happening at her cervical spine (neck) area. As she recognized that “stop”, she became aware of her attitude of “just because”.  She then had a memory of herself as a child and being told “because I said so”.  She also recognized that overtime this “just because” attitude led her to procrastination.

She was aware that she was procrastinating in most area of her life, but did not connect the dots to why or what she can do to change.  She frequently asked herself questions like; “why would I want to do this or that? It makes no difference and it does not matter when I pick up the garbage from the floor or wash the dishes etc”… as a response to being directed by adults who gave her no choice and when questioned she was told “because I said so”.

In repatterning her old habits, she realized that she actually loves it when her house is clean, her work is done on time and wakes up in the morning to a kitchen with space on the countertops.  She realized that the “why” in her doubts were pointing her towards her love of and liking things. And so were the adults in her life, who were just unskilled in their communications. All of those mattered. And with an emotional release of tears, she recognized that SHE matters too.

At the end of her session she reported “feeling lightness in my belly and there is a flow in my neck.”

What are your bodily experiences and/or procrastination pointing you towards?

 

Healing through Somato-Emotional Release (SER)

A client mentioned an unwanted happening in her marriage to which she kept having the same reaction. She cringed. Like most people, she wanted this unwanted happening to end by stopping her husband’s action from happening.

Recognizing a Pattern

As we tapped into what actually was happening through her, she realized and heard a physical experience of a static noise in her head. To the question whether she remembers this noise happening before in her life, she noted a particular event with her mother in which she found herself thinking “I did not want this, I don’t know what to do”. She felt so stressed at that time that she needed to leave her mother’s house. She went to the beach and shared her thoughts with a friend.

Connection and Growth

At the time she did not know, but in our SER session she understood, that as she was talking to her friend, she was also working her thoughts out within herself, and she recognized that what what she wanted was connection and growth in her relationship with her mother. She was able to reconcile her discontent with her mother and their relationship became stronger. She was able to face her mother’s decisions with compassion and support.

The Saving Grace in Saving a Marriage

In her mind and relationship with her husband, this same concept did not exist. She wanted her husband to stop doing what she did not want or knew how to deal with. She was contemplating a divorce. Her experience was the same – cringing, static noise and, not knowing what to do – but this time she had resentment on her mind when she talked about the situation. As she connected the dots of symptoms and thought patterns, she came to the understanding that her choice of resentment is a detour from creating a happy marriage.

Making a Decision

She made the decision to think of her husband that same loving way she thought about her mother. Not because she felt her husband deserved it, but because she remembered who SHE was. She decided to remember love within and take action from that memory. A simple change like this moved their relationship from going forward with the divorce she was contemplating to keeping the dancing in their marriage alive.